Our Thoughts on Open Adoption

We want to thank you for taking the time to get to know us a little better. We are excited to grow our family through adoption and we can’t wait to open our hearts and share our love, family, and sense of adventure with our child. We want our child to know and understand his or her adoption story and to actively participate in an open adoption in a way that is most comfortable for the birth family. We would love to exchange letters, pictures, and emails and to have occasional visits. We think that it will be important for our child to know his or her genetic family, to understand his or her background and culture, and most importantly, develop a relationship with his/her birth family. We look forward to meeting and getting to know the birth mother (birth father and family) of our future child, and we wish her peace and strength throughout this journey.

Both John and Alex grew up with friends and cousins who were adopted. Back then it was all closed adoptions. Having experienced closed adoption through their eyes, we believe maintaining some level of openness is best for our child. Plus that’s what all the experts say these days. We understand that that might feel very difficult for everyone at first. But over time we think it will be best for everyone to remain involved to whatever degree they (and we) feel comfortable with.

Orchard Adoption Cards

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Pool Time With The Kiddos

What are we doing while we await for our home study to be written up? Well, last weekend we went down to Alex’s brother’s mountain cabin. His family likes to ski in the winter but it’s also fun to go in the summer because they have a neighborhood pool. And since Alex and her brother both have waterproof cameras we were able to capture some fun pool pics!

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Home Visit

Our social worker came to our house today to ensure that we can provide adequate and non-dangerous shelter for our future child. We passed. πŸ˜‰ In just a few short weeks we will be officially and legally approved to adopt.

One question she asked us was, “What do you think is the most challenging part of parenting?”

We looked at each other slightly bewildered. Where to begin?

Apparently most people answer “Sleep deprivation.” That seems rather short-sighted to us. We take the long view of things. Yes, we intend to adopt an infant and sleep deprivation will surely be a challenge. But that infant will grow to be a toddler and require potty-training. A wholly different challenge from what I hear. And eventually that child will become a teenager who wants to drive a car. Yikes! And even once s/he turns 18 and beyond, we will, of course, still worry. Parenthood is filled with challenges and they change year to year or even day to day. Out of 18+ years we couldn’t pick any single thing that will be most challenging.

Except perhaps the worry. Learning to live with the fact that we will worry over this child for the rest of our lives. Learning when to hold on tight and when to let go. That might be quite a challenge indeed.